|Facts about pancake day
||[Feb. 5th, 2008|01:27 am]
- Pancake day is an ancient pagan festival, thinly Christianised. The original pancake celebration was much like the one we know today, but St Augustine (not the one with the hippos, the one with forty monks) obliged our Saxon forefathers to replace the element of "debauched Odin-worship" with "pancakes" and replace the element of "human sacrifice" with "sugar and lemon".
- Fascism is caused by an absence of pancakes.
- Just as fasting for Lent is a symbol of devotion to Jesus, so the consumption of pancakes weakens Jesus, and prevents him from carrying out his evil plan: returning to Earth as undead zombie Jesus to eat the brains of the living.
- In America, pancake day is celebrated at British consulates, which are for this reason known by the name "International House of Pancakes".